My father lived by Romans 13:7-- "Owe no man any thing."
Dad hated debt. The most he ever made in his life was $60 a week. He worked many days during the Great Depression for $1 a day and was happy to get that.
Mom and Dad had eight children, and I was the youngest. After Mom died and Dad remarried, he took reponsibility for two more. Just having a family that size is enough to put most people into dire poverty. But my parents raised a family of hard workers, and our poverty wasn't dire. Sure, we didn't have an extra dime, but our poverty in those days didn't come close to the poverty that chokes families affected by alcohol and drug addictions, abuse, greed, hatred, and rebellion toward God.
We were rich with the love of God and one another. The willingness to work made us rich with satisfaction in what we earned. The chickens and animals we raised for food, and the fresh vegetables and fruits we grew in the garden and preserved made the table rich with bounty.
But my father's commitment to stay out of debt also was a blessing. Although he didn't make much money, he bought land at tax sales and later resold it. He made a garage into a rental house, and when some of the children married, the upstairs became another apartment. He built a new small house on the back side of our land, then sold it.
The day he bought a shiny new Chevy with cash was a big day. It wasn't nicer than anyone else's--but it was paid for.
With today's economy, experts who study history and look at the future say getting out of debt should be a high priority for preparing for perilous times. We need to watch how we spend our money. Do we really need any more clothes? Is it necessary to eat out so often? Are all the luxuries in our homes necessary? Do we need the best and highest-priced television cable packages?
Do we try to save on utilities and other expenses that aren't fixed?
If we keep track of where the money goes, we'll be surprised at how much goes into a black hole that has no significant purpose.
There are definite advantages to being raised poor. I know I can get by on much less than I spend now.
Consumer Credit Counseling teaches there are two types of people: Those who spend because they think only of immediate gratification, and those who think only of the future. Their financial advisers say it's best for married couples to be from opposite groups. People who think only of tomorrow don't enjoy life. Those who live only for this moment never have any money and usually are in debt.
I think all of us can develop the ability to mix saving/spending into our characters. To get out of debt, we might need to think more of the future, but when we accomplish that feat--we'll have a wonderful time in the present.
Doesn't that sound like a good way to survive perilous times?
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Perilous Times 2
Even in these critical times, God is still faithful. We can't forget that. People still find hope and joy in Jesus! Just about two weeks ago a young Jewish man visited a church near us as part of his rabbinical studies about other religions. Suddenly he connected the Old Testament to what he saw and heard there and accepted Jesus as Savior, Lord and Messiah. However, now he may suffer for his new faith. His parents might disinherit him.
In the midst of revival and outpouring of God’s spirit, Satan still is at work. We should never forget our enemy goes about as a roaring lion seeking those he can devour.
As the time of Christ’s return nears, evil men and seducers will get more numerous and aggressive, Paul warns. In 2 Timothy 3 he suggests the unthinkable: Those who live godly in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution, and if we deny Him, He will deny us.
These are unsettling thoughts for Americans. Oh, how we have enjoyed religious liberty!
In most other countries, Christians understand Paul’s warnings well. What does the Lord, in Paul’s inspired writing in 2 Timothy 3-4, tell us to do in perilous times?
1. Remain faithful to the things we have learned. We need to read the Word!Paul talks about people following fables, and because of their lusts they will not endure sound doctrine but choose teachers that will satisfy their itching ears (tell them what they want to hear). The Word says to turn away from these people and their teachers.
2. Paul pauses to remind that “All scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and help us to realize what is wrong in our lives. The Word teaches us how to do what is right. It is God’s way of preparing us in every way, fully equipped for every good thing God has called us to do” (2 Timothy 3:16NLT).
3. Keep a clear mind in every situation. Don’t be afraid of suffering. Work at bringing others to Christ….Be persistent, whether the time is favorable or not. Patiently correct, rebuke, and encourage(2 Timothy 4:5,2).
Paul did most of his writing from prison. He understood hard times and persecution. But the purpose of Paul’s letter to Timothy, which he expected to be read in the churches, was “that all the Christians would be filled with love that comes with a pure heart, a clear conscience, and a sincere faith. Love is at the top of the list, and the type of love he speaks about is quite different from the usual.
There is much to pray and think about, and goals to achieve in these perilous times as well.
In the midst of revival and outpouring of God’s spirit, Satan still is at work. We should never forget our enemy goes about as a roaring lion seeking those he can devour.
As the time of Christ’s return nears, evil men and seducers will get more numerous and aggressive, Paul warns. In 2 Timothy 3 he suggests the unthinkable: Those who live godly in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution, and if we deny Him, He will deny us.
These are unsettling thoughts for Americans. Oh, how we have enjoyed religious liberty!
In most other countries, Christians understand Paul’s warnings well. What does the Lord, in Paul’s inspired writing in 2 Timothy 3-4, tell us to do in perilous times?
1. Remain faithful to the things we have learned. We need to read the Word!Paul talks about people following fables, and because of their lusts they will not endure sound doctrine but choose teachers that will satisfy their itching ears (tell them what they want to hear). The Word says to turn away from these people and their teachers.
2. Paul pauses to remind that “All scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and help us to realize what is wrong in our lives. The Word teaches us how to do what is right. It is God’s way of preparing us in every way, fully equipped for every good thing God has called us to do” (2 Timothy 3:16NLT).
3. Keep a clear mind in every situation. Don’t be afraid of suffering. Work at bringing others to Christ….Be persistent, whether the time is favorable or not. Patiently correct, rebuke, and encourage(2 Timothy 4:5,2).
Paul did most of his writing from prison. He understood hard times and persecution. But the purpose of Paul’s letter to Timothy, which he expected to be read in the churches, was “that all the Christians would be filled with love that comes with a pure heart, a clear conscience, and a sincere faith. Love is at the top of the list, and the type of love he speaks about is quite different from the usual.
There is much to pray and think about, and goals to achieve in these perilous times as well.
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
HOW TO PREPARE FOR PERILOUS TIMES--introduction to a series
The news about our nation’s condition is unsettling. Big corporations, banks, individuals, cities and multiple states are bankrupt or going that way. The U.S. government could be close to bankruptcy. Greece is teetering on the edge of financial disaster.
It doesn't make any difference how much money we Americans have in the bank if the FDIC is bankrupt, stocks and bonds become worthless, and our nation collapses.
Even more bad news plagues us. Our freedoms seem to be in jeopardy. A judge canceled the National Day of Prayer. Our religious liberties have been under attack for decades. Immorality and rebellion probably are near the highest point of history.
Brings to mind the Apostle Paul’s words, “In the last days there will be very difficult times. For people will love only themselves and their money. They will be boastful and proud, scoffing at God, disobedient to their parents, and ungrateful. They will consider nothing sacred. They will be unloving and unforgiving; they will slander others and have no self control.
“They will be cruel and have no interest in what is good. They will betray their friends, be reckless, be puffed up with pride, and love pleasure rather than God. They will act as if they are religious, but they will reject the power that could make them godly. You must stay away from people like that” (2 Timothy 3:1-5).
In Chapter 4, Paul continues to describe the problem. “A time is coming when people will no longer listen to right teaching. They will follow their own desires and will look for teachers who will tell them whatever they want to hear. They will reject the truth and follow strange myths.
Does that sound like America in 2010?
I hope it doesn’t describe you or the folks you hang out with. I see myself in parts of it.
So, what should we do? I’ll share some of Paul’s solutions in future blogs.
It doesn't make any difference how much money we Americans have in the bank if the FDIC is bankrupt, stocks and bonds become worthless, and our nation collapses.
Even more bad news plagues us. Our freedoms seem to be in jeopardy. A judge canceled the National Day of Prayer. Our religious liberties have been under attack for decades. Immorality and rebellion probably are near the highest point of history.
Brings to mind the Apostle Paul’s words, “In the last days there will be very difficult times. For people will love only themselves and their money. They will be boastful and proud, scoffing at God, disobedient to their parents, and ungrateful. They will consider nothing sacred. They will be unloving and unforgiving; they will slander others and have no self control.
“They will be cruel and have no interest in what is good. They will betray their friends, be reckless, be puffed up with pride, and love pleasure rather than God. They will act as if they are religious, but they will reject the power that could make them godly. You must stay away from people like that” (2 Timothy 3:1-5).
In Chapter 4, Paul continues to describe the problem. “A time is coming when people will no longer listen to right teaching. They will follow their own desires and will look for teachers who will tell them whatever they want to hear. They will reject the truth and follow strange myths.
Does that sound like America in 2010?
I hope it doesn’t describe you or the folks you hang out with. I see myself in parts of it.
So, what should we do? I’ll share some of Paul’s solutions in future blogs.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Old Friends
Facebook brought people back into my life recently that I hadn't heard from in years.
Many had been in my Sunday school classes in various churches. With Les's railroad job, we moved many times since we wed.
Others are among friends, and what great people they are! That's the joy of changing your environment often. Moving gives you the opportunity to enlarge your circle.
Some that I've connected with were teen-agers and a few were children when I saw them last. But they were interested in connecting with me, and what a privilege! They grown up to be fine specimens, and they are examples of what a difference it makes when you give your life to Jesus.
Critical people have told me over the years they believe non-Christians are better at relationships than Christians. I laugh at that. I've met some of the greatest people on earth among the hundreds of Christians we fellowshiped with in Colorado, Utah and Missouri. Perhaps a few rotten potatoes surfaced, but I'd estimate you can't ask for a better friend than 98 percent of these people. Yes, they were quite ordinary in most ways. Very few were rich or famous. They probably had a few flaws, but they wanted to be a "vessel of honor" and many were close to pure gold.
That gives me a little glimpse of what Heaven will be like. From what I can tell most of my friends are going there. What a time we're going to have!
Many had been in my Sunday school classes in various churches. With Les's railroad job, we moved many times since we wed.
Others are among friends, and what great people they are! That's the joy of changing your environment often. Moving gives you the opportunity to enlarge your circle.
Some that I've connected with were teen-agers and a few were children when I saw them last. But they were interested in connecting with me, and what a privilege! They grown up to be fine specimens, and they are examples of what a difference it makes when you give your life to Jesus.
Critical people have told me over the years they believe non-Christians are better at relationships than Christians. I laugh at that. I've met some of the greatest people on earth among the hundreds of Christians we fellowshiped with in Colorado, Utah and Missouri. Perhaps a few rotten potatoes surfaced, but I'd estimate you can't ask for a better friend than 98 percent of these people. Yes, they were quite ordinary in most ways. Very few were rich or famous. They probably had a few flaws, but they wanted to be a "vessel of honor" and many were close to pure gold.
That gives me a little glimpse of what Heaven will be like. From what I can tell most of my friends are going there. What a time we're going to have!
Friday, November 27, 2009
Does Snopes know all?
Snopes.com is this generation’s way to determine truth. Internet users rely on the website because so many misleading and untrue e-mails circulate in cyberspace.
According to Wikipedia, David Mikkelson and Barbara Hamel created the Snopes.com myth-busters website in 1995 to reveal e-mail hoaxes and confirm or debunk widely spread urban legends. The site has more than six million visitors a month
The Mikkelsons say their intention is not merely to dismiss or confirm misconceptions and rumors, but to provide evidence for such debunkings and confirmations as well. Although they claim to research their topics heavily and provide references when possible, not all of their sources are fully verifiable, says Wikipedia. Where appropriate, pages are generally marked "undetermined" or "unverifiable" if the Mikkelsons feel there is not enough evidence to either support or disprove a given claim.
They have learned, as have seekers throughout the ages,that truth often is difficult to
come by.
Societies historically tried many methods to determine when a person was lying. The Chinese sometimes filled a suspect’s mouth with uncooked rice and the person would be judged guilty if the rice could not be spit out quickly and easily. The test was based on the idea that people who lie don’t create saliva.
Some ancient civilizations required a suspect to grab a white-hot metal rod and carry it to a marked destination. If the burns on the person’s hands did not heal by a certain date, the person was ruled guilty and punished.
More humane was a serum introduced in the 1920s by a Texas obstetrician, Dr. Robert House. He believed a person under the influence of the drug scopolamine was unable to tell a lie. In an era of corruption and crime, it was hoped the drug could turn people to honesty, but it’s use as a lie detector was not widely accepted..
“Truth Serum,” an anesthetic or hypnotic such as thiopental sodium or sodium pentathal, later was believed to cause a person to speak only the truth, but these drugs weren’t totally reliable, either.
Today we have the polygraph, which supporters say is 90 percent accurate, yet in many court rooms the results can’t be entered as evidence.
The best court cases depend on physical evidence and eyewitnesses’ testimony, but sometimes truth is still elusive.
In the days Jesus walked the earth, some people questioned whether He was truthful, despite His miracles, compassion, and claim to be God. “I tell you the truth,” might be the phrase most often spoken by Jesus. The four Gospels record Jesus saying those words at least 80 times.
But Jesus not only assured people He told the truth, He said, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No man comes to the Father except through me” (John 14:6). He assured them that when He went away, He would sent the Holy Spirit, which would lead them into all truth (John 16:13).
How do we know what to believe? Truth is difficult to prove. The folks at Snopes.com have been accused of allowing political beliefs to influence their conclusions. Whether that is true, we know faith becomes involved what we decide is true, even in secular situations. We need faith in the carrier of information. We need faith in witnesses to believe what they say. We need faith the evidence actually shows what the experts say it does, and put trust in the way in which evidence is gathered.
I’ve known superstitious people who firmly believe things I consider absurd. People believe in the horoscope and fortune tellers. A large number of folks believe we appeared on this earth with seeing eyes and hearing ears without a creator.
God equipped each of us with a free will so we could decide what we believe. The scripture states, “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16). Salvation is based on belief. That’s why you can’t prove God exists! Faith is the requirement for Salvation.
Yet, our loving Heavenly Father didn’t leave us without solid reasons for faith. He provided witnesses, testimony and evidence everywhere about who He is.
Whether we believe it is up to us.
According to Wikipedia, David Mikkelson and Barbara Hamel created the Snopes.com myth-busters website in 1995 to reveal e-mail hoaxes and confirm or debunk widely spread urban legends. The site has more than six million visitors a month
The Mikkelsons say their intention is not merely to dismiss or confirm misconceptions and rumors, but to provide evidence for such debunkings and confirmations as well. Although they claim to research their topics heavily and provide references when possible, not all of their sources are fully verifiable, says Wikipedia. Where appropriate, pages are generally marked "undetermined" or "unverifiable" if the Mikkelsons feel there is not enough evidence to either support or disprove a given claim.
They have learned, as have seekers throughout the ages,that truth often is difficult to
come by.
Societies historically tried many methods to determine when a person was lying. The Chinese sometimes filled a suspect’s mouth with uncooked rice and the person would be judged guilty if the rice could not be spit out quickly and easily. The test was based on the idea that people who lie don’t create saliva.
Some ancient civilizations required a suspect to grab a white-hot metal rod and carry it to a marked destination. If the burns on the person’s hands did not heal by a certain date, the person was ruled guilty and punished.
More humane was a serum introduced in the 1920s by a Texas obstetrician, Dr. Robert House. He believed a person under the influence of the drug scopolamine was unable to tell a lie. In an era of corruption and crime, it was hoped the drug could turn people to honesty, but it’s use as a lie detector was not widely accepted..
“Truth Serum,” an anesthetic or hypnotic such as thiopental sodium or sodium pentathal, later was believed to cause a person to speak only the truth, but these drugs weren’t totally reliable, either.
Today we have the polygraph, which supporters say is 90 percent accurate, yet in many court rooms the results can’t be entered as evidence.
The best court cases depend on physical evidence and eyewitnesses’ testimony, but sometimes truth is still elusive.
In the days Jesus walked the earth, some people questioned whether He was truthful, despite His miracles, compassion, and claim to be God. “I tell you the truth,” might be the phrase most often spoken by Jesus. The four Gospels record Jesus saying those words at least 80 times.
But Jesus not only assured people He told the truth, He said, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No man comes to the Father except through me” (John 14:6). He assured them that when He went away, He would sent the Holy Spirit, which would lead them into all truth (John 16:13).
How do we know what to believe? Truth is difficult to prove. The folks at Snopes.com have been accused of allowing political beliefs to influence their conclusions. Whether that is true, we know faith becomes involved what we decide is true, even in secular situations. We need faith in the carrier of information. We need faith in witnesses to believe what they say. We need faith the evidence actually shows what the experts say it does, and put trust in the way in which evidence is gathered.
I’ve known superstitious people who firmly believe things I consider absurd. People believe in the horoscope and fortune tellers. A large number of folks believe we appeared on this earth with seeing eyes and hearing ears without a creator.
God equipped each of us with a free will so we could decide what we believe. The scripture states, “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16). Salvation is based on belief. That’s why you can’t prove God exists! Faith is the requirement for Salvation.
Yet, our loving Heavenly Father didn’t leave us without solid reasons for faith. He provided witnesses, testimony and evidence everywhere about who He is.
Whether we believe it is up to us.
Monday, November 9, 2009
Who is Jesus?
Jesus came to earth to demonstrate who He is.
Eleven people closest to Him wrote about Who Jesus Christ is. We can read their testimonies in the New Testament. According to tradition, all gave their lives because of their faith in Him, with the exception of John, who died in exile on Patmos Island.
In his book, "Evidence that Demands a Verdict," Josh McDowell wrote that no one would give his life for something he knew was a lie.
The disciples were there when Jesus walked on water, calmed the storms, fed thousands on a bit of fish and bread, healed the sick, raised the dead, died on a bloody cross in agony for our sins, and rose from the dead three days later.
These men knew Jesus. But we also may know him.
By becoming one of us Jesus:
1. Demonstrated concern about our eternal destiny. "In my Father's house are many mansions. I go to prepare a place for you ... that where I am you will be also." (John 14)
2. Demonstrated he cares about our lives. "The thief (Satan) comes to steal and destroy but I come that you might have life to the full." (John 10:10)
3. Demonstrated concern for our physical needs. He healed the sick and fed His followers.
4.Demonstrated power over our emotional needs by healing the brokenhearted and comforting those who mourn.
5. Demonstrated the need to resist Satan by sending the tempter fleeing when the devil came to Him (Matthew 4:1-11). Satan wanted Jesus to start a "reality show" by turning stones into bread, jumping off the pinnacle of the temple without a parachute. Then He offered Jesus rulership of the world, which is laughable since Jesus was there at creation. Hebrews 4:15 says, "This HIgh Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same temptations we do, yet he did not sin."
6. Demonstrated compassion. He was not annoyed by interruptions; he loved on children; cried at Lazarus' death; and restored Peter to the ministry even after Peter denied he knew him.
7. Demonstrated his power not only to stop storms, but to change lives. The sinful woman at the well experienced a transformed life. So did the man delivered from demon possession who dwelled among the tombs, so wild he couldn't be chained. He cut himself and cried day and night. Suddenly he was delivered and in his right mind. (Mark 5:1-15)
Jesus didn't use his power to draw attention to himself, but because He loves people.
8. Claimed to be God and demonstrated His divinity by walking out of the tomb alive, verified by many witnesses. He said, "The truth is, I existed before Abraham was even born!" (John 8:38 NLT)
9. Demonstrated His love for humankind by dying on the cross in order that death would be swallowed by life (2 Corinthians 5:3-5). For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." (John 3:16)
10. Demonstrated how He will come back for His church when He was taken up before their very eyes and a cloud received him out of their sight. An angel told the 500 men and other dumbfounded believers, "Men of Galilee, why do you stand here looking into the sky? This same Jesus, who has been taken from you into heaven, will come back in the same way you have seen him go into heaven." (Acts 1:9-10).
That's who Jesus is. Do you know Him?
Eleven people closest to Him wrote about Who Jesus Christ is. We can read their testimonies in the New Testament. According to tradition, all gave their lives because of their faith in Him, with the exception of John, who died in exile on Patmos Island.
In his book, "Evidence that Demands a Verdict," Josh McDowell wrote that no one would give his life for something he knew was a lie.
The disciples were there when Jesus walked on water, calmed the storms, fed thousands on a bit of fish and bread, healed the sick, raised the dead, died on a bloody cross in agony for our sins, and rose from the dead three days later.
These men knew Jesus. But we also may know him.
By becoming one of us Jesus:
1. Demonstrated concern about our eternal destiny. "In my Father's house are many mansions. I go to prepare a place for you ... that where I am you will be also." (John 14)
2. Demonstrated he cares about our lives. "The thief (Satan) comes to steal and destroy but I come that you might have life to the full." (John 10:10)
3. Demonstrated concern for our physical needs. He healed the sick and fed His followers.
4.Demonstrated power over our emotional needs by healing the brokenhearted and comforting those who mourn.
5. Demonstrated the need to resist Satan by sending the tempter fleeing when the devil came to Him (Matthew 4:1-11). Satan wanted Jesus to start a "reality show" by turning stones into bread, jumping off the pinnacle of the temple without a parachute. Then He offered Jesus rulership of the world, which is laughable since Jesus was there at creation. Hebrews 4:15 says, "This HIgh Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same temptations we do, yet he did not sin."
6. Demonstrated compassion. He was not annoyed by interruptions; he loved on children; cried at Lazarus' death; and restored Peter to the ministry even after Peter denied he knew him.
7. Demonstrated his power not only to stop storms, but to change lives. The sinful woman at the well experienced a transformed life. So did the man delivered from demon possession who dwelled among the tombs, so wild he couldn't be chained. He cut himself and cried day and night. Suddenly he was delivered and in his right mind. (Mark 5:1-15)
Jesus didn't use his power to draw attention to himself, but because He loves people.
8. Claimed to be God and demonstrated His divinity by walking out of the tomb alive, verified by many witnesses. He said, "The truth is, I existed before Abraham was even born!" (John 8:38 NLT)
9. Demonstrated His love for humankind by dying on the cross in order that death would be swallowed by life (2 Corinthians 5:3-5). For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." (John 3:16)
10. Demonstrated how He will come back for His church when He was taken up before their very eyes and a cloud received him out of their sight. An angel told the 500 men and other dumbfounded believers, "Men of Galilee, why do you stand here looking into the sky? This same Jesus, who has been taken from you into heaven, will come back in the same way you have seen him go into heaven." (Acts 1:9-10).
That's who Jesus is. Do you know Him?
A Huge Anniversary
Today Pops and I have been married almost as long as my mother lived.
By today's standards, she had a short life and we have a long marriage.
When I was a reporter for the Lifestyle Department, sometimes I interviewed folks who had long marriages. I think I started talking to couples married 60 years, but then it went up to 70; then 75. Pops and I aren't near that mark yet, but as life expectancy increases, more couples celebrate that many years together.
One thread ran among all the anniversary interviews, no matter the background or religion: "We experienced a few times where we could have divorced, but we stuck it out and overcame our problems."
Over and over these experts on how to make a marriage work repeated the Apostle Paul's advice in Ephesians 4:6 which says, "Don't sin by letting anger gain control over you. Don't let the sun go down while you're still angry." (NLT) The couples didn't say where they learned this, but I knew and I've tried to put Paul's advice into my life and marriage myself.
Ephesians 4 gives wisdom about how to live. If I could do everything Paul suggests, I'd probably be perfect. But I'm not. I'm still the fiery redhead my husband married and we're both as opinionated as we've always been. We mesh well in many areas, but there are a few that create sparks. Real arguments are seldom won. We both end up with the opinions with which we began.
My mom used to say, "A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still."
When co-workers had a hot discussion in the newsroom about politics or the issue of the day, they'd sometimes ask what I thought. I responded, "Argument never proves anything. All it does is prove who is better at debate."
Sometimes it proves who is the most stubborn, too. Talk to us, and my husband would tell you I'm the stubborn one. I would disagree.
In our marriage, most things we discuss aren't that important. It helps me to admit to myself it's trivial. But there are things hugely important to me. These things aren't debatable and I'm glad my husband and I agree on the important principles of life.
Jesus made a simple power-point for us so we'd know where to put our priorities. Too many of us miss the first point: "Love the Lord your God with all your passion and prayer and intelligence" (Matthew 22:36-37 The Message).
Then Jesus added, "Love others as well as you love yourself."
I'm still working on those goals, and I can testify that commitment to God and each other results in success for marriage.
By today's standards, she had a short life and we have a long marriage.
When I was a reporter for the Lifestyle Department, sometimes I interviewed folks who had long marriages. I think I started talking to couples married 60 years, but then it went up to 70; then 75. Pops and I aren't near that mark yet, but as life expectancy increases, more couples celebrate that many years together.
One thread ran among all the anniversary interviews, no matter the background or religion: "We experienced a few times where we could have divorced, but we stuck it out and overcame our problems."
Over and over these experts on how to make a marriage work repeated the Apostle Paul's advice in Ephesians 4:6 which says, "Don't sin by letting anger gain control over you. Don't let the sun go down while you're still angry." (NLT) The couples didn't say where they learned this, but I knew and I've tried to put Paul's advice into my life and marriage myself.
Ephesians 4 gives wisdom about how to live. If I could do everything Paul suggests, I'd probably be perfect. But I'm not. I'm still the fiery redhead my husband married and we're both as opinionated as we've always been. We mesh well in many areas, but there are a few that create sparks. Real arguments are seldom won. We both end up with the opinions with which we began.
My mom used to say, "A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still."
When co-workers had a hot discussion in the newsroom about politics or the issue of the day, they'd sometimes ask what I thought. I responded, "Argument never proves anything. All it does is prove who is better at debate."
Sometimes it proves who is the most stubborn, too. Talk to us, and my husband would tell you I'm the stubborn one. I would disagree.
In our marriage, most things we discuss aren't that important. It helps me to admit to myself it's trivial. But there are things hugely important to me. These things aren't debatable and I'm glad my husband and I agree on the important principles of life.
Jesus made a simple power-point for us so we'd know where to put our priorities. Too many of us miss the first point: "Love the Lord your God with all your passion and prayer and intelligence" (Matthew 22:36-37 The Message).
Then Jesus added, "Love others as well as you love yourself."
I'm still working on those goals, and I can testify that commitment to God and each other results in success for marriage.
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