Sunday, March 31, 2019

A Tribiute to my wonderful brother Everette

By Ada Brownell

Note: My brother, Everette Nicholson's funeral was March 15.

Everette always called me his Baby Sister, usually at an octave above his normal speech tone.

He had lots of sisters, --five us, and two brothers.

Something happened in our family that had an impact on us all when the family moved from Kansas to Colorado. The pastor in a church in Fruita heard a big family was moving to town and asked the congregation to pray for us.  We got settled in, and my oldest sister, Marjorie, got an invitation to go to church with her. Mamahad a fit. "That's the 'Holy Roller' church!
Daddy said, "Let her go. I heard they teach children to obey their parents there."
So Marjorie went, and soon God sent a friend to the other older children: Virgil, Clara, and Everette, and they all accepted Jesus Christ as their Savior. But soon my parents, and eventually all of us became born-again Christians.

Being the baby of the family, I was privileged to have great role models. I was seldom punished, because I learned from the examples of seven siblings – saved,following the Lord, workaholics and achievers. I wanted to be just like them. What a blessing they were!

Everette was one of the six red heads in our family. Only Joe and our oldest sister Marjorie escaped. The fact red heads are always thought to have a temper, seemed to bother Everette. That might have been because our red headed mother frequently reminded  us of the scripture, “Be swift to hear, slow to speak and slow to wrath.” I only remember Everette losing his temper once in my life. He believed in self control.

But Mama used to tell the story about Everette having an encounter with a bull when he was a kid. The bull came up behind him and charged. Everette, still a child, got up, grabbed a board and faced the bull yelling, “Knock me down, will you?” The bull turned and thundered the other direction.

Mama was so proud of Everette. He was a pastor. In Mama’s mind you couldn’t have a better calling than being a pastor or a teacher, and all her sons fulfilled that, although she died before they reached all they would achieve.


Because Everette and Elinora pastored in Colorado after I was married, we ran into them at fellowship meetings where they were scheduled to sing. Each time they insisted that I join them because they liked trios. Everette was a great tenor, and he could sing lead OR harmony. Elinora and I would go over the song with him a couple of times, and we were good to go.

When we moved to Missouri, I sang trios with them at Maranatha, at Praise Choir concerts at Central Assembly, and at Strafford Methodist Church where Everette, since he was retired, taught a Sunday school class and sometimes preached when the pastor was gone.

Everette was a great support with my writing ministry. He read through my book, Swallowed by Life, two or three times and told me how it blessed him.  He had read Confessions of a Pentecostal, years ago, other novels,. A couple of weeks before he went to heaven he told me he enjoyed my new fiction book, Love’s Delicate Blossom, where some of my characters are based on our extended family. He wondered why I didn’t use their real names.

“I read every word of it,” he said.

That was nearly 90,000 words. And with eyes 91 years old.

What a sweet, wonderful brother Everette was to me. I’ll miss him. But we sorrow not as those who have no hope for Jesus said, “He that lives and believes in me will never die” (John 11:26). We’ll praise God for that blessing throughout eternity.

Monday, March 25, 2019


Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you.

James 4:8 (KJV)

Walk with Him

By Sara L. Foust

It’s been a hard day. Maybe you can relate. It seems here lately, all the days are hard. Filled with doctor visits and snarky pre-teens who don’t want to listen, and heaven forbid they actually do anything I ask them without arguing. My days start early. I never get a full 8-hours. I can’t remember the last time, really. There have been a lot of tears lately too. It seems I held them behind a huge dam, and now that it has burst, the floodwaters pour a whole lot more freely than before.

There are two ways to get through these hard times, I’ve found. Alone and together with God. I’ve done a lot of those days alone, fighting through each minute depending on my own failing strength, my own sense of justice, my own ideas about what’s right and wrong. It’s amazing how we humans, created by God, for God, think we are so tough and infallible sometimes. And one of the wonderful things about our Father is that He never forces us to behave differently.

But I can imagine Him sitting up there, shaking His head and maybe even lovingly chuckling at my fallacies. I can imagine Him saying, “She’ll come around. Just a few more minutes or hours and she’ll remember where the real power lies.” I am so thankful that He never gives up waiting on me and never forgets about me. And mostly, I am thankful that when I do finally look up and remember Who’s really in charge, He’s right there.

Now for those together-with-God walks. They are so much better. Not always easier, mind you. But always better. When I give Him control and don’t waste my time wrestling Him over what is His anyway, things just seem to go more smoothly. That’s the kind of wonderful God we serve. He wants to help me. He doesn’t want me to struggle needlessly or lose my way because of unnecessary stops and turns. Those extra problems all come from me trying to make decisions without consulting Him first.

The hard days aren’t so hard when I let God show me each move to make. And the tears don’t feel so wasted when I let Him hear the causes behind them.  I don’t tell you any of these things to gain your sympathy or for you to feel sorry for me, but rather to remind whoever it is out there needing some encouragement that God is with you, every minute of every day. When you feel up. When you feel down. When you feel crazy in between. He is waiting for you to look to Him and ask Him to lead. I promise, it’s so worth it.

Author Bio:

Sara is a multi-published, award-winning author and homeschooling mother of five who writes surrounded by the beauty of East Tennessee. She earned her Bachelor’s degree in Animal Science from the University of Tennessee and is a member of American Christian Fiction Writers. She is the author of the Love, Hope, and Faith Series, which includes Callum's Compass (2017), Camp Hope (2018), and Rarity Mountain (March 2019).  She also has a story, “Leap of Faith,” in Chicken Soup for the Soul: Step Outside Your Comfort Zone and a novella, Of Walls (November 2018). Sara finds inspiration in her faith, her family, and the beauty of nature. When she isn’t writing, you can find her reading, camping, and spending time outdoors with her family. To learn more about her and her work or to become a part of her email friend’s group, please visit

Short, short bio:


When their current careers are yanked away, they are left scrambling to pick up the pieces. A reality television show falls into their paths, offering a life-changing opportunity that tests their resolve and their faith.

These two unlikely partners must battle to survive for thirty days in the untouched wilderness of Rarity Mountain with only a handful of survival items and a director who is out for drama, no matter the cost. With their lives and their carefully guarded skeletons on the line, they will discover how far they are willing to go to win the million-dollar prize for Survival Tennessee.

Buy Links:

Friday, March 22, 2019



Excerpt from the book, Imagine the Future You. Here is the book summary:

A motivational Bible study by Ada Brownell
Ready or not, you’re going into your future.
If you continue to do what you do now, what kind of future will you have? This Bible study will help you discover evidence for faith in God; how to look and be your best; who can help; interesting information about dating, love and marriage; choosing a career; how to deposit good things into your brain you can spend; and how to avoid hazards that jeopardize a successful life on earth and for eternity, all mingled with true stories that can make you smile.
Review:  How I would have loved to sit at Mrs. Brownell's knee when I was a teen. This wholesome book resounds with sage, Godly advice and could be picked up again and again as needs arise. Worthwhile for parents too. Much fodder for family discussion.
            Also available in Audio. Read or listen to first chapter free! #Teens #Family #Devotions



The Creator of the universe loves you and will guide you into blessed tomorrows.

God— the One who is, who always has been, and who always will be, is the most important person you can meet. He is your Creator, and what your future is like depends on your relationship with Him.

I know more and more young people are atheists today. This is by design by the secularists who write curriculum, teach in our schools, the universities, and have taken over our government and media. As I’ve said before, there is active brain washing to assure you won’t believe in God.

I’ve said many times in the past “atheism is the opiate of the sinner.” If wicked people at least think they don’t believe in God, it helps quiet their conscience. But their conscience won’t quit, so they blame it on other people . Apparently they know what Christians believe is real, so they target Christians. They think stopping the influence of Christianity will help them feel better in their sinful state. That is why religious freedom is in danger in the United States.

So, your future is wrapped in whether you believe in the God of the universe. For that reason I will present the truths to you in this chapter you might not have heard.

Besides creating you, “In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.”[1] That’s the opening verse of the Bible—Genesis 1:1.

That sentence is where the debate begins, but it’s nothing new. Atheists and agnostics argue extensively on this subject. Yet, they can’t prove God is not there. Neither, however, have Christians proved without a shadow of doubt God is the Creator and interested in humankind.

Because we can’t prove how we got here, atheism takes faith, as much or more faith than it takes to believe in a loving God. To be an atheist, man must be­lieve the eyes he sees with and everything he sees and even things he can’t see just happened, including the origin of matter, life and the exact mixture in the air we breathe: nitrogen, oxygen, water, argon, carbon dioxide and trace gases.


Now, some Christians do believe in evolution—but with God starting the process. But those who believe in God don’t believe the universe or the magnificent human body happened by itself.

Most secular professors and teachers will not hesitate to tell you what to believe and not believe about your origins, but even scientists disagree.

One of the most interesting debates on evolution occurred in October 1980, when 150 scientists met in Chicago and began openly bickering among themselves, thundering forth conflicting theories.

Some scientists at this conference promulgated the “big bang theory.[2] This theory, obviously not the TV show, contends that instead of millions of leisurely evolution­ary years, the world began all at once, Bang!, in a great galactic explosion of atoms and enzymes.

Darwin’s theory also came under attack from scientists—because missing links are still missing after more than a century since Darwin.

“Fossil hunters have not found the fossils needed to explain the glar­ing differences between major species,” Associated Press newspaper columnist Hugh A. Mulligan reported. “In the whole cycle of environmental selection, with all the genes and embryos playing splitsville according to the evolutionary plan, no six-legged vertebrate has yet walked forth upon the earth.”

Science has pro­vided few or none of the examples of one major species shading gradually into another.

Fossil experts, not clergymen, are Darwin’s most formidable opponents, according to Phillip E. Johnson, author of Darwin on Trial.[3] Although Darwin’s theory revolved around survival of the fittest, paleontologists often disagree with Darwin because appearance of an improved form implies a disadvantage of its parent form. Many supposed parent forms still survive, and the missing links just aren’t there, even though they’ve been searched for since 1859, when Darwin wrote Origin of the Species.

“There always will be missing links if we think in terms of link between all change,” a university anthropologist argued when I interviewed him. He said changes in Darwin’s theory have occurred, the most recent the theory of “punctuated equilibrium,” which he explained relates to the time taken for one species to shade into another.

“A form which had been a small variant, might have great rapid growth,” he said.

He used the doubling of chromosomes in some species as an example of radical change in a short period.

On the other hand, he admitted such doubling could be caused by the environment and also that most mutations are undesirable rather than desirable.

He used a fruit fly as an example of a species with a short life span where such changes in chromosomes could be observed. But he admitted the insect still was a fruit fly.

“It is very difficult for an average scientist to test evolution,” he said. “Our lives are too short and the research too specialized. The theory is the result of collective effort.”
Any serious student with an open mind will eventually admit any species that has experiences changes is still the same species.


One psychology professor openly ridiculed Christians in one of my university classes with more than seventy students. As the instructor made sarcastic remarks about Christians in the news and preached his atheistic ideas, I wondered why no one challenged him. One day I raised my hand.

 “You said this textbook will be outdated in ten years,” I began. “So what you are saying today might not be true in ten years?”

[1] Genesis 1:1
[2] Charles Percival, Pueblo Chieftain, Aug. 9, 1992, page 6B.
[3] Darwin on Trial (Downers Grove, Ill.: InterVarsity Press, 1993), 45.


Sunday, March 10, 2019

Carole Brown's new romanic mystery

The Heart that Loves is Always Young—Greek Proverb

My genre of choice is suspense and/or mystery. BUT, I love including romance within my books. Why? Let's list a few reasons:

·       Readers love it! Romance is the best selling genre of today's publishing world.

·       It brings a warmth to a novel that lures readers to continue their reading.

·       It's a great escape. Readers have a real world. A world filled with problems and heartaches at times, and for them, for a little while they can forget their own lives.

·       Encouragement. We know not everything is or ends as a fairy tale story in real life, but it's an encouragement to strive for that fairy tale—realistically—and hope to improve our own romantic lives.

·       Romance brings out emotions. The world calls us to be strong, career driven and the “amazon” woman. But reading romance—included in whatever genre—touches the emotions that are sometimes hidden within ourselves.

Suspense is known as mysterious, dramatic, at times a little scary or intense. But when I create touches of romantic passages (clean!) in my books, I can lighten that heavier scene.

Let's show you an example:

Knight In Shining Apron, Book Two of the Appleton, WV Romantic Mystery series

Excerpt from Chapter  19

“I lovingly insist.”

How could she resist that dazzling smile every time he wanted something from her? The answer? She couldn’t, even though she could feel her skin tingle with a tad bit of unease. Not enough to make her draw back for long, or object too strenuously. Long time habits died hard. At least for her. But she’d meant that pledge to God and to Joel. Trust or die trying. That's why she was going along with his idea of talking to Stu about plans to rebuild. But would the bank agree if they already had a problem with a loan for a more up-to-date oven?

She cocked her head sideways to look at the man driving his sporty convertible. Yep. Just as beautiful as she’d thought not a minute before. She chuckled when the vision of him protesting at her latest verbal compliment about being beautiful flashed into her mind.

“Men aren’t beautiful, My Princess,” he'd said.

But they were. At least, he was. He couldn’t win that argument. She laughed now, thinking about their argument, and he joined her, even though she knew he didn’t know why.

“Right on time.” He didn’t bother to open his door, only scooted up in his seat and stepped over the door. He flung open her door and took her hand to help her out. “Have I told you lately how beautiful you are?”

“No, you haven’t. It’s been all of fifteen minutes since you picked me up and informed me of that very fact. Far too long for me to remember it.”

Joel tucked her hand in the crook of his arm. “Don’t you be sassing me, My Princess.”

“Oh, I won’t.” What fun he was.

Just a touch of romantic warmth in this excerpt, but in the midst of Starli overcoming her emotional problems, it gives the reader a break and propels them further into the story. It helps create a barrier between the hardships we put our characters into and the light that shines onto them at times. For a suspense/mystery novelist, it's vital.

To everything there is a season...a time to love.  --Song of Solomon

Knight in Shining Apron -- Cover Blurb:
By Carole Brown

Starli Cameron gave up her career plans to be a concert pianist to marry the man of her dreams. He turned out to be a nightmare. When he dies in a car accident, Starli takes the insurance money and builds a successful and upscale restaurant: Apple Blossoms in rural West Virginia.  Threats from someone determined to ruin her life and the suspicious romantic advances from her new chef force Starli to search her heart and finally turn to God for real healing.

Sir Joel Peterman-Blair, top notch chef from England, is roped by his uncle, into filling in as head Chef at Apple Blossoms. Joel, with his sanguine-personality, has always laughed and flirted his way through life. But now, confronted with and attracted to the most beautiful woman he’s ever met, Joel has to prove his sincerity and depth of character to his icy-cold employer. Can his love for God and for this woman reach out far enough to rescue her from her own mistrust and bitterness? Will he learn that life is not all play?

And can they both work together to find the source of threats that seem to be coming from Starli’s past? 

Buy the book:

Meet Carole Brown

Carole Brown

Besides being a member and active participant of many writing groups, Carole Brown enjoys mentoring beginning writers. An author of ten books, she loves to weave suspense and tough topics into her books, along with a touch of romance and whimsy, and is always on the lookout for outstanding titles and catchy ideas. She and her husband reside in SE Ohio but have ministered and counseled nationally and internationally. Together, they enjoy their grandsons, traveling, gardening, good food, the simple life, and did she mention their grandsons?

Buy the book:

Thursday, March 7, 2019


By Ada Brownell

Republican, Democrat, Independent, or Socialist, a large majority of women eligible to vote have a huge liability—time to think.

For years, I didn’t vote because I didn’t have time to investigate the candidates. I didn’t even know which political party to align myself with.

Our five children grew up and didn’t require so much care, so I began to pay attention when an election loomed ahead.

I began to think, and knew babies are more than a blob in a woman’s uterus. Our fifth child was the only one that was a surprise, and even though well-meaning friends who didn’t take time to think advised me to have an abortion, I knew I had a baby in my womb, who lived from the moment of conception, moved, had hiccups, and grew in my belly.

Yes, I had a child with severe asthma that demanded much of my time, but the daughter that I delivered has been such a blessing and a joy!

 I decided the first thing I’d want to know about a candidate is that person’s view of abortion. No matter what else the candidate supports, if the person didn’t respect life, I’d vote for the other party.

After that would come things such as support for our military, a commitment to freedom according to the Bill of Rights and the Constitution. Yes, I’ve taken time to read both documents. I want someone who will also open our borders to legal immigration, and shut the door to those who break the law to come.

 I’d want the person to be wise about how to help the poor, defend the handicapped, and find solutions to providing health care at a reasonable cost, prevent Medicare and Medicaid from going bankrupt by tightening wasteful spending, which includes advertising for medications that can’t be purchased without a prescription. I’d want the candidate to support and build more community health centers, where patients pay on a sliding fee according to income. I want someone with the guts to defund Planned Parenthood, and get the government out of the abortion business.

The greatest thing about freedom is I can think about my vote and cast it accordingly.

I pray this generation of women will register, and get out and vote. But first, take time to think about who you’re voting for, and how that vote will affect their future, perhaps even into old age.

--Ada Brownell is a retired reporter for The Pueblo Chieftain and the author of several hundred published magazine articles and nine books.

Friday, March 1, 2019



An excerpt from Ada Brownell's book, Imagine the Future You.

NOTE: Ada Brownell spent seven years as a medical writer for The Pueblo Chieftain.

By Ada Brownell

What will you bring into your marriage?

 Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walks about, seeking whom he may devour” 1 Peter 5:8.

A high school human sexuality teacher who is a Christian did this experiment for me in a class I taught at our church’s Dunamis Academy.

She gave paper and pencils to everyone. Before class, she marked an X on the back of one of the papers, but none of the kids knew it. She instructed students to shake hands with other teens and have them sign each other’s papers. They shook hands and gathered signatures for five minutes, and then returned to their seats.

“Turn your papers over and see if there is an X on the back,” she told them. A girl found the X and raised her hand.

The teacher told her to stand up. “She has Virus X. Who signed her paper?”

Five hands went up, and those kids stood.

“Now these five have the virus. Who signed their papers?” Four more got out of their seats, also contaminated by the fictional “virus.”

Six more admitted their fate.

Eventually all remaining students were “infected.”

“This is how sexually transmitted diseases spread,” the teacher said. “When you have sex with someone, you are essentially going to bed with every person that individual had sex with, because once a sexually transmitted disease is shared, it is contagious until the disease is cured—if the disease has a cure. You might be intimate with only one person but be exposed to multiple diseases.”

Some STDs, such as herpes, cause severe misery and are incurable, but they don’t kill. But the HIV-AIDS virus isn’t the only one that kills. Both hepatitis B and C affect the liver and can take your life. Human papilloma virus (genital warts) sometimes causes cervical cancer. Chlamydia and gonorrhea, left untreated, can affect joints and heart valves and cause pelvic inflammatory disease, infertility, and even blindness.

 A story by Lawrence K. Altman published in the New York Times on March 12, 2008, said the first national study of four common sexually transmitted diseases among girls and young women found that one in four is infected with at least one of the diseases.


 But the federal study could have pointed out three out of four do not have the disease. I imagine a large number of them were virgins.

When my husband and I were married, couples took blood tests to check for STDs. When a virgin discovered she was set to marry someone affected with a disease, there was time to call off the wedding. Of course, my husband and I had nothing to worry about, and the test came out negative.

I would guess in my day most of us were virgins, and I knew my beautiful white satin gown testified to that fact.

According to Kelsey McIntyre in From Times Past, white has been accepted as the preferred wedding dress color since Queen Victoria married her cousin Albert of Saxe-Coburg in 1840. Godey’s Lady’s Book in 1849 reported, “Custom has decided, from the earliest ages, that white is the most fitting hue, whatever may be the material. It is an emblem of the purity and innocence of girlhood and the unsullied heart she now submits to the chosen one.”

A wedding gown probably is the most beautiful dress most women wear in their lives. Even the least expensive are exquisite.

Young men, too, probably will never be more handsome than the day they stand at the altar waiting in a tuxedo for the beautiful bride.

Children often like to play “bride and bridegroom,” and during their growing years, many girls dream of the day when they walk down the church aisle, dressed in white, as the wedding march fills the sanctuary.

In 1953, about half of all women were married by age twenty, and half of all men by age twenty-two. In 2002, the average age for the bride was twenty-five and bridegroom age twenty-seven.

Today, thousands of couples are living together without being married, and multitudes of young women give birth to babies without being married. In addition, approximately fifty million babies have been killed by abortion in the United States since abortion became legal in 1973.

Something happened. A large number of young men don’t bend a knee and extend a tiny box containing a diamond and ask their beloved to marry them. Instead, many just want to rush the girls off to bed somewhere and perhaps live together.

Some folks blame the lack of finances and needing to wait to earn a college education as the reason to delay marriage, but it doesn’t make sense. You can get a marriage license for a few bucks. A pastor will marry you for free, but it’s customary to pay him one hundred dollars or so. A couple can live cheaper than two single people, and you can get your education after marriage. I did. Thousands of people earn their degrees later, and most of the people did from generations before us.

But there is something else—and it’s huge. Young women and men are giving away their virginity as if they are dropping a penny on the sidewalk and leaving it there. Guys who already have a sexual relationship with a woman won’t hurry to get married. A woman who gives away her virginity before marriage risks never being married—especially to him!


With throwing away virginity goes the dream of walking down the church aisle in a white wedding gown or a tuxedo as a virgin, pure and unblemished. Maybe the bride will wear white, but it won’t mean anything—especially to the couple.

In addition, sex before marriage causes emotional consequences. Physicians Joe S. McIlhaney and Freda McKissic Bush, authors of the book Hooked,[1] say neuroscience has discovered sexual activity releases a chemical that impacts the brains of developing adolescents and young adults. These chemicals cause an emotional bond between partners, and when this bond is broken, the youth suffers depression and difficulty with bonding in future relationships.

In contrast, when the bride is a virgin and her man loved her enough to control his own urges for his wedding day, there is suspense, excitement, electricity, and sparks that go way beyond the fireworks of the wedding. When they bow their knees together and pray with the minister’s hands on their heads, they are serious about this commitment. They recite their vows to God, concluding with tears in their eyes, “Until death do us part,” and they intend to keep their vow. If they continue to follow Him, God will help them through the better or worse, thick or thin, hair or baldness, sickness or health, poorer or richer.

Staying pure until the wedding night is the way God dreams of life for young couples.

Sure, God knows about sex. He invented it. Here’s what God’s Word says: “Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled” (Hebrews 13:4).

One time during the hippie generation, evangelist Billy Graham visited a college campus and asked students what they would like to talk about.

“Let’s talk about sex!” yelled one uncouth student.

“Sure,” said the evangelist with a smile. “That’s how we all got here, isn’t it?” Then he explained sex is a wonderful thing between two married people, and marriage is endorsed by God. But he added sex outside of marriage will bring only sin and sorrow.

Young people who accept anything less than God’s best for them learn early about the sorrow.

For a newspaper story, I visited and interviewed a high school class for unmarried students who were pregnant or had babies. These girls were angry! They were furious at their former boyfriends. Only one out of about twenty was still dating the guy. The girls were upset at their parents. They didn’t want their parents interfering with their lives, although they needed financial support and help with the child. I think some of them were capable of anger at their babies, too, and that was one reason for the parenting class—to teach them how to love and care for the children and to prevent physical abuse. Just shaking a baby can cause mental retardation and dire consequences.

A large percentage of girls who give birth out of wedlock have another child in two or three years, even though they aren’t married. A few complete high school and college and go on to a successful career, but the life they always dreamed of often eludes them. Many of the girls will spend the rest of their lives in poverty, feeling unloved.

Don’t believe it when someone tells you STDs can be prevented even if you are sexually promiscuous or have sex with someone who has been exposed to a disease. Some of the devices do help, but all have a failure rate, as do birth control methods.

Don’t believe it, either, if Satan tries to make you believe the sexual experience will be

worth anything you pay for it. In a moment of passion, people do believe that. In reality, it often is over within a few seconds. Some counselors say single men seldom find it as satisfactory as married sex, and women almost never are satisfied with early sexual encounters.


Many young people are ruining their health, future, and their lives by having sex before marriage. All over America, however, are youth who respect themselves enough to wait until they get married. These young women—and there are larger numbers of them than you would think—aren’t concerned about being “sexy” or whether they have a date for the weekend. The girls have lots of girlfriends and friends who are boys. The boys enjoy friends of both sexes, too. Many go places in groups but usually don’t pair off with the opposite sex. Others date, but sex is off-limits.

These gals have goals in life they plan to reach.

Wise young people keep their eyes on goals they want to pursue and stand firm in not allowing Satan to snatch their future. Even some who aren’t dedicated to God know they’ll never reach their goals if they take that beer, smoke that pot, use that drug, or engage in premarital sex. They don’t want to be stuck with an addiction or a disease, a baby to support, or a hysterical person in love with him or her at this point in life.

Young people who are committed to God have those and much deeper reasons for resisting temptation. It’s not because parents and pastors get up and yell and warn them about the dangers of premarital sex, although the warnings should be heeded.

It’s because they made a commitment to the Lord, who loves them more than anyone, and they want to please God and obey His Word.

God started in Old Testament times warning about the dangers of sexual sins by giving the seventh commandment, “You shall not commit adultery.”

Many counselors and some Bible translations say adultery covers all forms of sexual sin. Furthermore, adultery is the only reason Jesus gave for divorce.[2]

Jesus put sexual sin on the same level with murder (Matthew 15:19). In Hebrews, we’re told God will judge the sexually immoral (Hebrews 13:4), and we’re told by Peter that Sodom and Gomorrah were examples of what happens to people who commit such sins, and if they do not repent, they will be cast into hell (2 Peter 2: 4–10).

John says if someone says, “‘I know Him (Jesus)’ but doesn’t keep His commandments, he is a liar, and the truth is not in him” (1 John 1:4).       

 We aren’t even supposed to be friends with people who commit sexual sin (1 Corinthians 5:9). We can try to win such people to Christ, but if they claim to be Christians and continue to sin, they should be excommunicated from the church (1 Corinthians 5:5). Paul says we should do that (1) for the sake of the offenders so perhaps they will repent and turn from their wicked ways and be restored to fellowship; (2) for the sake of the church’s purity (verses 6–8); and (3) for the good of the world. If the church is just like the world, how can we expect to win people to Christ?

Paul explains the reason we should not have fellowship with or have such people in our church membership is because “a little leaven (or yeast) leavens the whole lump.”

Of course, if people truly repent of sexual sins and turn from their wicked ways, God will have mercy on them and forgive them, and the church should welcome them with open arms. New Christians should not, however, be put into positions of leadership until they have proved themselves as dedicated Christians who follow the Lord (1 Timothy 3:6). Yet, in this world they will still reap much of the harvest of their sins, for what a man sows, he will reap.[3]

God knew what He was doing when He created marriage and put within us a desire to love a person of the opposite sex so much we’ll want to spend our whole lives with him or her, even when we’re upset with the person, he or she turns old and ugly, we’re out of money, or our spouse becomes disabled or ill.

That is true love.

It is the commitment to their relationship that makes another person know he or she is loved—not a willingness to have sex.

Waiting is not easy if you begin dating when you’re age twelve. It’s also difficult with long engagements if you see each other every day.

Your future is in your hands. If you want to walk down the aisle a virgin, and if you want to marry a virgin, you need to decide how you’re going to accomplish your goal. You will accomplish this shimmering walk with your will, your decisions, and assistance of the power available through our Almighty God. The Bible says, “Resist the devil and he’ll flee from you.”


  • Don’t watch immorality on TV or in a movie. If it’s placed before you, walk out.
  • Consciously reject lustful thoughts when Satan tries to put them into your head.
  • Don’t dress seductively; dress modestly (see 1 Timothy 2:9).        
  • Don’t start dating until you’re sixteen or older. If you’re not ready to get married, why court? It just complicates your life. When you break up with someone, he or she is no longer your friend. When the person dates your friend, you’re mad at your friend. If you don’t date, you can be friends with everyone!
  • When you do date, do most of your activities with groups and in public places. Don’t spend a lot of time kissing and holding one another close.
  • Never have a person you are dating in your home when you are alone or in your bedroom, or lie down together anywhere.
  • Be aware that you don’t need to date someone to lose your virginity. Molesters steal the innocence of young people—male and female—every day. Don’t sit on an uncle’s lap or drape yourself over your favorite cousin—or even your dad. Don’t be alone with any member of the opposite sex anywhere that could make opportunity for lust to capture the sinful mind. It usually starts with an inappropriate touch. The prophet Jeremiah wrote: “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?” (Jeremiah 17:9).
  • Don’t dance. There is a reason why dancing is a fertility rite among primitive cultures: It arouses sexual desires.   
  • Don’t think you are above temptation because you are a Christian. Satan walks about as a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour. And Satan wants to destroy you—especially if you are a Christian.
  • When you know you’re in love, value that person. Treat her or him with respect, and also treat yourself with respect. You are made in the image of God.
  • Don’t have a long engagement. Married people do get through college, and do find jobs to support themselves. If, however, you are not willing to work (and this includes cleaning house, washing dishes, and cooking), you aren’t grown up enough or self-disciplined enough to be married.
  • Begin praying now for the person you will marry because he or she is alive somewhere right now, even though you most likely don’t know the individual. Pray he or she will dedicate himself or herself totally to God, keep pure, and be committed to God’s will.

If both of you want God’s will for your lives and are willing to use your own will to achieve going into your marriage as virgins, you’ll be successful!

It is true that even if you’ve sinned, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ, and if we ask forgiveness and turn from sin, He will abundantly pardon. Counselors now talk about “secondary virginity.” The woman caught in the act of adultery, in danger of being stoned to death, Jesus rescued. But he told her, “Go. And sin no more.” Never plan to sin and then ask forgiveness. Open rebellion against God is a dangerous thing. Real virginity is precious, and once lost it is forever gone.  

[1] Moody Publishers, 2008.
[2] Matthew 5:32
[3] Galatians 6:7