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| Ada and Les Brownell 1953 |
By Ada Brownell
Excerpt from Imagine the Future You
When my husband and I were married, couples took blood tests
to check for Sexually Transmitted Diseases.
When a virgin discovered she was set to marry someone
affected with a disease, there was time to call off the wedding. Of course, my
husband and I had nothing to worry about, and the testa came out negative
.
I would guess in my day most of us were virgins, and I knew
my beautiful white satin gown testified to that fact.
According to Kelsey McIntyre in From Times Past, white has been accepted as the preferred wedding
dress color since Queen Victoria married her cousin Albert of Saxe-Coburg in
1840. Godey’s Lady’s Book in 1849
reported, “Custom has decided, from the earliest ages, that white is the most
fitting hue, whatever may be the material. It is an emblem of the purity and
innocence of girlhood and the unsullied heart she now submits to the chosen
one.”
A wedding gown probably is the most beautiful dress most
women wear in their lives. Even the least expensive are exquisite.
Young men, too, probably will never be more handsome than
the day they stand all dressed up at the altar waiting the beautiful bride.
Children often like to play “bride and bridegroom,” and
during their growing years, many girls dream of the day when they walk down the
church aisle, dressed in white, as the wedding march fills the sanctuary.
When we married In 1953, about half of all women were married by age twenty,
and half of all men by age twenty-two. In 2002, the average age for the bride
was twenty-five and bridegroom age twenty-seven.
Today, thousands of couples are living together without
being married, and multitudes of young women give birth to babies without being
married. In addition, more than fifty million babies have been killed by
abortion in the United States since abortion became legal in 1973.
Something happened. A large number of young men don’t bend a
knee and extend a tiny box containing a diamond and ask their beloved to marry
them. Instead, many just want to rush the girls off to bed somewhere and
perhaps live together.
Some folks blame the lack of finances and needing to wait to
earn a college education as the reason to delay marriage, but it doesn’t make
sense. You can get a marriage license for a few bucks. A pastor will marry you
for free, but it’s customary to pay him one hundred dollars or so. A couple can
live cheaper than two single people, and you can get your education after
marriage. I did. Thousands of people earn their degrees later, and most of the
people did from generations before us.
But there is something else—and it’s huge. Young women and
men are giving away their virginity as if they are dropping a penny on the
sidewalk and leaving it there. Guys who already have a sexual relationship with
a woman won’t hurry to get married. A woman who gives away her virginity before
marriage risks never being married—especially to him!
IMAGINE: UNBLEMISHED
With throwing away virginity goes the dream of walking down
the church aisle in a white wedding gown or a tuxedo as a virgin, pure and
unblemished. Maybe the bride will wear white, but it won’t mean
anything—especially to the couple.
In addition, sex before marriage causes emotional
consequences. Physicians
Joe S. McIlhaney and Freda McKissic Bush, authors of the book Hooked,[1] say neuroscience has discovered
sexual activity releases a chemical that impacts the brains of developing
adolescents and young adults. These chemicals cause an emotional bond between
partners, and when this bond is broken, the youth suffers depression and
difficulty with bonding in future relationships.
In contrast, when the bride is a virgin and her man loved
her enough to control his own urges for his wedding day, there is suspense,
excitement, electricity, and sparks that go way beyond the fireworks of the
wedding. When they bow their knees together and pray with the minister’s hands
on their heads, they are serious about this commitment. They recite their vows
to God, concluding with tears in their eyes, “Until death do us part,” and they
intend to keep their vow. If they continue to follow Him, God will help them
through the better or worse, thick or thin, hair or baldness, sickness or
health, poorer or richer.
Staying pure until the wedding night is the way God dreams
of life for young couples.
Sure, God knows about sex. He invented it. Here’s what God’s
Word says: “Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled” (Hebrews
13:4.
In contrast, sex before marriage exposes a person to sin that could jeopardize an eternal future; to a multitude of horrific diseases; pregnancy that not only affects both sex partners but also a baby, and impacts emotional and spiritual health.
Don’t believe it if Satan tries to make you believe
the sexual experience will be worth anything you pay for it. In a moment of
passion, people do believe that. In reality, it often is over within a few
seconds or minutes. Some counselors say single men seldom find sex outside of marriage as satisfactory as
married sex, and women almost never are satisfied with early sexual encounters.
IMAGINE REACHING YOUR GOALS
Many young people are ruining their health, future, and
their lives by having sex before marriage.
All over America, however, are youth
who respect themselves enough to wait until they get married. These young women and men—and
there are larger numbers of them than you would think—aren’t concerned about
being “sexy” or whether they have a date for the weekend. The girls have lots
of girlfriends and friends who are boys. The boys enjoy friends of both sexes,
too. Many go places in groups but usually don’t pair off with the opposite sex.
Others date, but sex is off-limits.
These young people have principles they believe in and goals in life they plan to reach.
Wise young people keep their eyes on goals they want to
pursue and stand firm in not allowing Satan to snatch their future. Even some
who aren’t dedicated to God know they’ll never reach their goals if they take
that beer, smoke that pot, use that drug, or engage in premarital sex. They
don’t want to be stuck with an addiction or a disease, a baby to support, or a
hysterical person in love with him or her at this point in life.
Young people who are committed to God have those and much
deeper reasons for resisting temptation. It’s not because parents and pastors
get up and yell and warn them about the dangers of premarital sex, although the
warnings should be heeded.
It’s because they made a commitment to the Lord, who loves
them more than anyone, and they want to please God and obey His Word.
IMAGINE THE FUTURE YOU
By Ada Brownell
Will you be the
person you dream of being—or someone from your nightmares?
You don’t need a
fortune teller to reveal your future. You are the person who determines who you
will be, what your life will be like, and how your hopes and dreams will be fulfilled.
This book will
show how to make the right connections, how to grow your talents, and how to
begin believing in yourself and things greater than yourself—for a wonderful
Future You!
A Bible study available in paper or for
Kindle http://www.amazon.com/dp/1489558284
TWEET
Read or listen to first chapter free! amazon.com/dp/14895582
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